You don't always get what you expect...

So, I'm thinking I'm going through a mid life crisis 10 years to early. :) I fell in love with that song, Firework by Katy Perry (The one I posted in my last post). In the real video she has this gorgeous long dark hair with purple streaks. I thought, I could do that. I would like to do that. I want to do that. I think I'm going to do that. And before I know it, I'm at the store picking out hair dye. I would have gone to my hair stylist, I wanted to really, but that is to expensive for us right now, so I had to settle for doing it myself. I thought if I could get it the right color on my own, then maybe I can go to her to help me add some small peek-a-boo purple highlights. My biggest concern was being a good example for the young women, so I haven't decided if I'll really go through with that part. So last night Mike and I picked out some dye. He found one that was a soft black with red highlights. I thought that would be perfect. My hair is light enough, I didn't really expect it to go black, just a darker brown with auburn highlights. Well, if you've ever dyed your own hair, you know, you don't always get what you expect!!

What do you think???! My eyebrows need some help and to be darker for sure, I'll work on that! 

Anyway, it's been fun. Today I was journaling on why I felt the need to make such a drastic change (I've started an actual journal). I think it's because I know that there is a lot of change that needs to happen. Here is the thing, I KNOW that if I dieted, or even just watched my food intake with intent and exercised for a long enough time period, I would lose weight. But I also know with out a shadow of a doubt it would just come back. I'm starting to see that second fact is not because I'm a failure. It's because there is more going on here. There are deeper issues that need to be worked through so that when I do get to the point that I'm ready to start working on my body's health, it will finally be able to stick. And I KNOW that these kinds of changes don't happen overnight. As much as we want them to. I want to wake up tomorrow healed. I want the traumas of my childhood to be gone. I want my relationship issues to be history. I want my weaknesses to all magically be strengths that help me help others. But it's not going to work like that. And if I act like it is, then I'm not really doing the work to cleanse my inner vessel and I'll end up right back here again another day. And I DO NOT WANT THAT. I never want to be here again. So instead of rushing my way through it, I changed something I could change right away. That I could have some control over (although apparently not a lot of control! :D ). And funny enough, this silly change brought on some helpful thoughts for me in my quest to cleanse. Who would have thought a $8 box of smelly stuff could do that much?! 

Have you ever made a drastic hair change?